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 pegm81484 |
Feedback: The One Who Loves You |
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Posts: 498 (01/18/07 18:21:53) |
This is my first attempt to write fan fiction EVER. I plan on it being a multi-chapter fic, but I dont have it all planned out yet so I dont know how long it will be. I would love constructive criticism and feedback. Just dont be too mean, I cry easily. Just kidding, comment however you want!
Thanks in advance to anyone who leaves me feedback! |
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LoVevmars |
Re: Feedback: One Who Loves You | ||
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Posts: 158 (01/18/07 19:28:45) |
I really love your fanfic. Are you going to continue on or is that how it ends? If not I can't wait until the next installment. It was awesome. It had all the elements of friendship, love & LoVe, agnst. Great job.
Tiera
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juelzrox |
Re: Feedback: One Who Loves You | ||
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Posts: 21 (01/18/07 21:03:58) |
Can I just say that your first attempt is really good? Because it is. The way you ended makes me want to know what happens next. You must continue!
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In love with LoVe |
Re: Feedback: One Who Loves You | ||
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Posts: 308 (01/18/07 22:20:36) |
So amazing! More please!!
 
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LoVesMeSomeLogan |
Re: Feedback: One Who Loves You | ||
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Posts: 226 (01/18/07 22:32:42) |
    -That's pretty much all I have to say about that....PLEASE CONTINUE!!! |
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ziebra |
Re: Feedback: One Who Loves You | ||
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Posts: 58 (01/18/07 23:36:27) |
Love it. Please continue, like ASAP.
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carlyhope |
Re: Feedback: One Who Loves You | ||
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Posts: 112 (01/19/07 00:35:03) |
This is perfect. I love the way you describe their emotions and cant wait till they act upon them. Me wants more :)
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pegm81484 |
Re: Feedback: One Who Loves You | ||
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Posts: 498 (01/19/07 06:43:49) |
LoVevmars- Thanks so much for the nice comment. I will be continuing and the new chapter should be up by next week.
juelzrox- Thank you, I will be continuing and hopefully you'll like the next chapter. In love with LoVe- Thank you so much! LoVesMeSomeLogan- That's a lot of icons lol, thanks for commenting! ziebra- Thank you, new chapter will be up soon! carlyhope- Thank you, I know my work is actually far from perfect, but I'm so glad you like it!  Made By smiles1777 over at LJ I have PMS and ESP...that makes me a bitch who knows EVERYTHING! |
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LoVeSpuffy |
Re: Feedback: One Who Loves You | ||
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Posts: 210 (01/19/07 10:49:58) |
 Dude, the premise for this story is one of my favourites for this fandom. Cannot wait for the next chapter. |
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lapdogdesign34 |
Re: Feedback: One Who Loves You | ||
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Posts: 159 (01/20/07 15:19:44) |
This is your first attempt at fanfic? It's really good! I like the premise, and I can't wait to see what happens next - especially when Logan talks about his abuse, and even more how Lilly reacts to V and Logan at school. Wow. So many possibilities! Update soon, please!
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mcyprusoilm |
Re: Feedback: One Who Loves You | ||
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Posts: 236 (01/20/07 23:01:34) |
Oh HELL Yeha I love this !!!!
 FIC!!!!Man, Oh man I only wish this would have really happened on the show. Wouldn't that have been nice. I am dying to see what the ramifacations are going to be now with Lily and Veroncia. is Lily going to go all evil bitch on her?? Will Logan stick up for Veronica and go agains Lily? Will Dounut stand by as usual and just let everything happen?? And will Veronica ever have an altercation with Aaron??? This are the questions this inquiring mind would love to know!!!  I can't wait to find out what happens next!!!!! Please, Oh Pelase update SOON!!!!!!!!!!!!Feed the Fic Whore Monster!! |
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pegm81484 |
Re: Feedback: One Who Loves You | ||
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Posts: 498 (01/21/07 12:04:38) |
LoVeSpuffy- Thanks so much, glad you enjoy the premise. The next chapter should be up soon, just waiting to get it back from my beta.
lapdogdesign34- You'll get to see all that and more eventually, thanks for the comment! mcyprusoilm- I'll update as soon as possible, thanks so much for reading and commenting! Made By smiles1777 over at LJ I have PMS and ESP...that makes me a bitch who knows EVERYTHING! |
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In love with LoVe |
Re: Feedback: One Who Loves You | ||
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Posts: 308 (01/24/07 19:50:06) |
I love this story. I really loved Lily on the show and sorta hoped she was good deep down. But I know that she probably wasn't so I love the way you portray her. She does have feelings and she was sort of regretful for ruining her and Veronica's relationship but she just doesn't care enough. That's exactly as I see her character on the show too. She's not heartless. She cares. Just not enough.
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marsficgirl |
Re: Feedback: One Who Loves You | ||
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Posts: 20 (01/24/07 20:09:31) |
I am surprised this is your first attempt, this is a good story. I am curious to see where you take this. Hope we get another update soon.
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jacedes |
Re: Feedback: One Who Loves You | ||
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Posts: 830 (01/24/07 20:31:20) Logan|Sex&Snark |
I can't believe this is your first fanfic! This is a dream come true for me. Logan and Veronica liking each other and acting on it. Veronica protecting Logan. Both of them telling Lilly off for the bitch that she is
Thank you for writing what I've always wanted to see happen. I always thought that, on the show, both Veronica and Logan forgave Lilly way too easily for sleeping with Aaron. And this way, they get to tell her off and be together at the same time I will go down with this 'ship.
I won't put my hands up and surrender There will be no white flag above my door, I'm in LoVe and always will be. |
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mcyprusoilm |
Re: Feedback: One Who Loves You | ||
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Posts: 236 (01/24/07 21:10:27) |
heheh ding dong the bitch is down. Hell Yeah I loved that end scene although I would have been funny if Veronica would have went all V version 2.0 on Lily's ass. I like how this is the trasnsition version Veronica (from Pre-Season1 to Season1). Shes finally showing her backbone!!!!
I loved the whole bedroom scene even when Keith walked in and Logan spoke with Keith to save V from lying to her dad right then, oh and the the dinner scene was sooo cute ahhh. Makeout sessions are ALWAYS lovely!!!!! Heck yeah Man, oh man I am DYING to see what happens next!!! How is the lunch between Logan and his mom going to go? What is Logan going to tell Keith about what happened??? and whats going to happen at school come Monday?? Is Lily going to do something? Or is Logan going to be able to squash her attempts to dis Veronica?? Hmm this is going to be INTERESTING for sure !!! hehe  Please, Oh Please update soon!!!!!!Feed the Fic Whore Monster!! |
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LoVesMeSomeLogan |
Re: Feedback: One Who Loves You | ||
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Posts: 226 (01/24/07 23:44:41) |
I'm loving it! Loving it!! Sometimes the dialouge can get a little corny...but what's the point of a fanfic if that doesn't happen??
It's adorable how close they are, and I love the love stories that have been there secretly for years. I'm not always fond of fics that make Lilly out to be the...worst person in the world, but this is really touching, moving, adorable, funny, suspensful, and Awsome!! I can't get over how many different directions you could go with this. And I also can't believe how much I'm truely enjoying it! update soon! Waiting in suspense here....
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LoVeSpuffy |
Re: Feedback: One Who Loves You | ||
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Posts: 210 (01/25/07 12:42:05) |
Totally awesome. The take down of Lilly was perfect. The first kiss was excellent. This chapter just plain rocked.
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pegm81484 |
Re: Feedback: One Who Loves You | ||
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Posts: 498 (01/25/07 18:12:39) |
Sorry if these are long winded, but I wanted to explain a little about the areas that some of you questioned or may have had a problem with. Thanks again for reading everyone!
 In love with LoVe- I'm so glad you love the story. I liked the character of lilly on the show as well, until she slept with Aaron because at that point her behavior wasn't just self-destructive it was hurtful to her friends as well. I truly believe that Lilly's insecurities are the reason behind her actions, that's why I had her character act the way she did in the story. She does care, but once things go wrong she doesn't know how to fix them and she ends up making them worse. marsficgirl- Thank you for such a nice compliment. Hopefully I'll be able to update soon! jacedes- Ok just a quick question are you jacedesbff on lj? I always wondered if you were the same person or not! Either way thank you so much for the praise. I know my story includes a lot of the L/V cliches that are out there, but you know what they make me happy and I think they make a lot of other people happy to. Its why we like them on the show! I agree they had Logan and Veronica forgive Lilly to easily, but I suppose it's much easier to forgive someone when they're dead as opposed to still alive. Especially if they're alive and saying the things she did in this chapter  !mcyprusoilm- Thank you for noticing that I did not actually have Veronica act completely like pre-series Veronica or season 1 Veronica either. I think that if the events would have played out like this Veronica would have become less naive, but wouldn't neccessarily have lost her sweetness in other areas (like with Logan or her parents). Obviously, she wouldn't be as hard because a lot of the stuff didn't happen to her that did in the series, but at the same time she does know more about the world because of what has happened. In the next chapter look forward to the conversation between Logan & Lynn... and that's all I'm going to give you! LoVesMeSomeLogan- I'm so glad you're loving it and that you made me think of McDonald's ads while complimenting my story lol! Wow you had a lot of really nice adjectives describing my story, which is really sweet and I thank you for that. I don't necessarily mean to paint Lilly as an evil bitch, but my feelings are that she was the type of person to go on the offense if someone questioned her. But that's just me, hope you keep reading! LoVeSpuffy- Thank you and you rock for saying such sweet things!! Made By smiles1777 over at LJ I have PMS and ESP...that makes me a bitch who knows EVERYTHING! |
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SummerLovesFall |
Re: Feedback: One Who Loves You | ||
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Posts: 125 (02/05/07 20:51:01) |
If you posted the next chapter within the next two minutes, it still wouldn't be quick enough. Your story has brought me out of my VM funk that the writers had put me in. I can't wait to see what happens with Papa Mars.
summer |
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jacedes |
Re: Feedback: One Who Loves You | ||
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Posts: 830 (02/05/07 21:32:57) Logan|Sex&Snark |
There was so much to love about this chapter! I'm glad that Veronica knew Logan wanted her to go with him to talk to Lynn. She's really good about being in tune with him. And how awesome was it that Logan called Veronica his girlfriend?
 I'm so glad that Lynn is a good mother in this fic - or at least, has done the best she could. I'm thrilled that she's taking all of these steps to get her and Logan away from Aaron. And of course I love that she approves of Veronica and wanted Logan to be with her instead of Lilly. I'm worried that Aaron will come after them, but I'm sure Keith will be able to handle it.Also, wanted to say that I agree that Aaron adopted Trina with his previous wife. We never heard anything about his first wife, but from what we have been told, that seems the only logical way for it to have happened. I will go down with this 'ship.
I won't put my hands up and surrender There will be no white flag above my door, I'm in LoVe and always will be. |
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